Is it RUDE to converse in Tagalog w/ a fellow Kababyan infront of NON-Pinoys?

[Cali4Nia]

Takin' a break from studying....here's another topic.

I find it rude and inconsiderate when I'm with a group of people of different nationalities and a couple of them start speaking in their own language in front of me.

I start feeling left out and uncomfortable. I can't understand a thing and I start to get suspicious because, who knows, they might be talking about you.

What could be so important or hush hush that they can't share with the group? If it is private subject then people who feel that they wanna talk in their native language should excuse themselves from the group to talk amongst themselves.

Pag kasama ko ay puros Pinoys eh di Tagalog ay walang problema para sa lahat.

So, I try to speak in English to a fellow kababayan when I'm with a group of people who are not all Pinoy. It might seem arrogant to some Pinoys but it's just common courtesy to me.

What do you guys think?



[Edited by Cali4Nia on 12-04-2000 at 01:49 PM]

[lupuS]

If what other people do make you feel uneasy, then maybe they feel the same way when you do it to them. I, too, prefer to speak English in a group where foreigners are present. If I need to speak Tagalog, I'll wait until we're out of earshot, or we ask to be excused.

[Ginataang_suso]

....it is not, but you need to utter "eksyus mi" first!

o di ba???

[dudung]

Among all races I have interacted with, it seems like that we, the Filipinos, are the only ones who are too particular with this. Other foreigners speak in their own language with their fellow "kabayan" even when they're front of me. My rule of thumb is still to speak to everyone in English even with my fellow Pinoys as a sign of respect. But since I work in a multi-cultural company and some of the people can be stubborn (and utterly rude....which means, I know they are talking about me in their own language), then I do the same to them when another Pinoy is with me. "Do not do unto others what you don't want them to do unto you."

[StJames]

It's not. If they butt in and tell you to speak in goddamn English, tell them to go someplace else if they just want to eavesdrop :lol:

[juve_grrrl10]

I agree with dudung that we are very sensitive to this. I don't think it is rude because foreigners speak their own language amongst themselves, too, even in the presence of people of other nationalities. Mas malala pa nga kung dito mismo sa 'Pinas nangyayari eh! Bakit ako mag-i-ingles eh ako'y nasa sarili kong bansa?!? :rolleyes:

[Katess]

I totally agree. I am associating/interacting with a lot of foreigners lately.. (Germans, Americans, Malaysians, Singaporeans, Italians) and it is a rule of thumb that everyone within the group must always speak in the universal language -- English, in this case.

It is just a matter of respect for the "other," I believe. Being in a multi-cultural group means you have to be responsible, not only for your words, but also for your actions because people from different places interpret a lot of things differently.
FYI -- ("po" in our language signifies "respect" but it means "butt" in German). ;)

I think that we have to learn to be a little sensitive about this issue, because we are known to be "friendly Filipinos!" Let's strive to have it remain that way in the eyes of others. :)

Have a good day everyone!

[topnotch97]

@ Cali

NOPE most of the time people look at you, and always wonder what nationality are you....and never did it occur to them that you are a Filipino....yup it seems that they don't even know what a Filipino looks like :lol: kawawa naman

[gravedigger]

Im not Filipino,but I have spent many years there.
So of course there have been many times that I have been in Filipino company.
At first they always speak English but usually after a few drinks,they forget and talk in tagalog.This is fine by me coz although I cant speak the language much,I can understand lots but I don`t let on. This is fun because its almost as good as mind reading!! This technique is best employed when listening to women,especially when Im the subject!! Sometimes I pretend that Im Italian and can`t speak a word of English,let alone Tagalog,and usually........ one thing leads to another!!!!!!!!!

The best excuse I have heared from a Pinoy who started to speak his language while in my company was "Escuse ha,my one kilo Englis is already finis". Wonderful stuff!!

[chikitita]

:lol: at gravedigger

us too, my friends and i.. we make it a point to speak in english when we're with foreigners. we even apologize if we start speaking in tagalog unconsciously. but we do lapse into tagalog sometimes, when we want to make private comments about some foreigner we're with, i.e. "ang kulit nitong katabi ko ha, batukan ko na 'to" or "uy, type ka nyan, patulan mo na" :lol: we're very discreet about it, though.

[latepinoy93]

I find it not very polite and rightfully so, how would you feel if everyone around you was speaking in some strange language but you know very well that they can speak good/passable english??

[Lightspeed]

I also had the chance to interact with a lot of foreigners when I was in the foreign service. The thing I noticed if there is a multinational group discussing something is that if , for example, a Thai would like to speak to a fellow Thai, then they lapse momentarily into Thai but always come back to English. The same with the Japanese, since they find it hard to speak in English. If a Japanese would want to clarify something with a fellow Japanese, then they briefly go into Nihonggo, but they go back to English if the clarification has been made.

For Filipinos, I noticed that we tend to revert to Tagalog and continue endlessly in Tagalog, thus making our foreign friends out-of-place. We should be sensitive to include everyone in the group in the conversation. We can go to Tagalog for clarification but go back immediately to English. If there are no more foreigners, then we can communicate in Tagalog as long as we like.

[cherub_08]

yes, i find it rude to speak in your native tongue when you are w/ foreigners. most likely these foreigners would get uncomfortable since they wouldn't know if you are talking against them. and vice versa. it's kinda offending too.

[sampaguita]

i grew up in a place where there was one other filipina in my graduating class. we spoke english most of the time because the rest of our barkada didn't understand tagalog. i think, too, that it's only common courtesy. it show that you are conisdering the rest of the company around you. you don't want them to feel uncomfortable or left out. i know it certainly makes me wanna pull my hair whenever i'm around people who are speaking in a different language and they have no intention of including me on the conversation.

[alemrac]

personally, I find it pretty rude. It's like you're excluding the foreigners from the conversation.

[guaputi-o]

kung tagalog ang (lahat) kausap mo hindi iyan bastos. mas bastos ang maging paki-alamero & eavesdropper. tila lahat ng mga ibang dayuhan ay naguusap sa kanilang sariling wika, at may walang nairereklamo sa kanila.
pero, kung may di marunong tagalog sa grupo ninyo, bastos iyan. parang ibig mong sabihin sa kanya, 'you aren't important' at 'wala akong paki-alam sa iyo'.

[NOKiE]

I'd say it can be rude only if we talk about them behind their back. Other than that, and other than whatever workplace guidelines call for in a workplace, it isn't. It is, however, a courtesy to non-PiNOYS for us to speak in English to satisfy their insecurity--they should be somewhat grateful for this gesture, and it is a gesture, isn't it? I only know Tagalog and English (and some Kapampangan words). I don't find it rude for a couple of Latinos conversing in spanish in front of me--it doesn't concern me; just don't let me find out they're talking about me or any acquaintance of mine behind my back :D :D :D

This condition applies anywhere (except at work) with total strangers. If I'm with my buddies consisting of different nationalities, then it CAN be rude--hey, they're my friends...

[clawed_out]

yes it is rude to speak in your native language in front of other people(foreigners)...

[reybelde]

It is NOT rude...it just depends kung paano yun ite-take ng nakikinig na foreigner. In wha instance would it be rude? :)

[nuss]

How about conversing in Ilonggo in front of Tagalogs? Isn't that the same banana?

[11# UST_guard'98]

You know what I hate!!!
There are lots of Spanish people at my work. I have this officemates who's also Filipino.

My spanish officemates always talk spanish in front of me and Mark (Filipino GUY)... i hate it ... they are so rude..
We just don't say a thing.. but if me and Mak having a private conversation in Tagalog (which is seldom to happen).. they think it's rude .. They keep asking what we talked abt.... HELLO!!! Look who's talking!!! AGHHH

[f0r5aK3n]

that's why that technology that they have in STAR TREK, the Universal Translator, someone should actually make that.. hehe.. so no more being rude or whatever....

[n0b0dy]

Frankly this topic is for the narrow minded. If you are worried about this thing maybe you are the one that has a problem. It just shows how you lack tolerance for other people. Or, maybe its your colonial mentality acting up?!?!
It would seem to me that you have acculturated the "ugly american" syndrme?! So what if other people chose to speak their language in front of you? If you are that paranoid about it, why don't you ask them what they are saying.

Personally, I have been in the middle of a german, french, chinese, japanese, indian and whatever conversation, and I did not mind. Face it, the world is getting smaller and interacting with other people of different languages is becoming common. So why sweat it?

[f0r5aK3n]

i don't think this topic is narrow-minded at all.. It is a legitimate issure among people of different cultures not just us Filipinos. Some companies I know actually have policies where you can't speak your own language in public or whenever upper management is around.... I, myself, don't mind it coz I don't care plus whenever someone speaks to me in Tagalog I always reply in English since my Tagalog isn't all that great....

[n0b0dy]

f0r5aK3n,

Let me retract the "narrow minded" comment.

These company policies that you are reffering to are symptoms of the prejudice don't you think?! WELL IT IS! Language is one way people are making an excuse to legitimize prejudice.

Its like saying those people who dare to speak their language in front of english speakers are "others" or less American? The author of the thread also states that she is suspicious of those people who speak their own language. Isn't that a very divisive reaction, and in my opinion very narrow minded. Should we be wary of other people just because they speak a different language in front of us?

I am sorry if I am so intolerant of intolerant people! Intolerance is the very thing that genocides are made of!
So we must stop this narrow minded attitude of intolerance no matter how harmless or justified it seems.

[Cali4Nia]

Nobody: No need to say sorry.

I've realized we all have our prejudices. Even people like you who are vehemntly against prejudice and intolerance can be found being just as prejudiced and intolerant towards people whose comments you find against your beliefs. And that's okay. You are entitled to your opinion.

But I don't think that in the USA, people who like to speak their native language among themselves when they are clearly in a social or professional setting and are part of a group that consists of different people of different nationalities are deemed LESS AMERICAN or 'OTHER'.

They should just be deemed RUDE and INCONSIDERATE because the other people who are around them who can't understand a damn thing they are saying are left feeling AKWARD. I view them as RUDE and not less American.

I'm sure there are perceptions being held by some that immigrant groups in the USA who speak their native language among themselves infront of english speakers are LESS AMERICAN and that is totally wrong and out of line. Rude, yes, but not less American.

It's just common courtesy when interacting with other people of different nationalities, especially in a group setting, to make sure that everybody is included in the conversation.

[Edited by Cali4Nia on 02-21-2001 at 04:31 PM]

[n0b0dy]

hehehe....

Let me digress some more. I guess I just got caught up by my emotions when I responded to the posts.

Cali4Nia, your opinions are well said. I hope I did not come accross as disrespectful in my attempt to convey my opinion, but I know I already did.

I still stand by with what I said, I don't see it as rude if people spoke their language in front of me. Most of you do, so be it. To each his/her own! ;)

Peace tayo! ;)

[f0r5aK3n]

Let me relate a funny story....

I was at a train station waiting for a train when these 2 Filipinas sat next to me and started speaking in Tagalog. At first, it was just about their own little world and then one of them looked at me. I pretended not to notice that she looked at me so, naturally she started talking about me to her friend. She goes "Ayoko talagang makakita ng mga taong parating nakasimangot." Well, I didn't really care what she was saying since it's all good with me. The thing of it is, she realized I was Filipno so she asked me if I was.. hahaah.. I just nodded mah head and she apologized....

I guess my point is.. yah, some people don't find it rude. But it would be weird and annoying if u realize that they're talking **** about you in their own language no matter how un-rude u think it maybe.. :)

[n0b0dy]

f0r5aK3n,

Innocence is bliss! What is rude about that situation is that they had no balls to say it to your face; then again they were ladies and I would be scared if they had gonads! Then again being too direct is frowned upon by some people too. What if they said it in English? Would that have made a difference? At least they had the civility not to attack you directly!

[:Þ]

It aint rude per se.. but it depends on the situation. I NEVER spoke tagalog or spanish when I'm at the office even whn I'm speaking with my fellow pinoy coworkers. that is simply practicing Professionality.

But when I'm out with friends, I speak tagalog like normal even if some of my latino friends are listening.

[clawed_out]

amen to that belat (sorry i forgot how to do that special characters!)

reybelde, simple manners...but refer to what belat mentioned earlier

[takahashi69]

don't get me wrong, i'm 100% filipino, but i don't speak much tagalog. i don't know how to speak it fluently yet. i'm in college and i really hate it when the person makes fun of you by speaking in a kind of comedic, i'm an idiot, broken english. what is wrong with those people, i'm here trying to learn mmy own home language and they make fun of me. mind you, this happens to other people too, not only me, i've seen it happen. they don't realise they are being downright rude to the non-tagalog speaking community.

[kIm_cHiC]

I find it rude and impolite to speak tagalog infront of the foreigners. I think everyone needs to respect each other and be considerate enough. So I guess we should just speak in plain english for others to understand.

[Noir]

i think it is unethical to converse in your native dialect in front of non-Filipino speaking group. In fact, i have friends who do that. it's just that they speak Kapampangan. i find it annoying coz i can hardly convince myself that what they're talking about isn't me at all. if you're in a place which speaks a particular language, speak it, and not the dialect or vernacular you're used to speaking.

[n0b0dy]

I feel all of you are wrong! There is nothing wrong with speaking your own language in front of people that can't understand it. Look at americans, they are all over the world, and for the most part they don't even try to learn the local language of countries they visit.

Maybe your problem is that you are afraid to be associated with or labeled as a "FOB" if you are seen with fellow Filipinos speaking tagalog in a mixed crowd of races.
Nanghihinayang siguro kayo dahil sayang ang lahat ng pag-prapractice ninyo ng American accent. LOL

noir

what does ethics have to with it? I mean if you are that un-comfortable talking with these "un-ethical" people then quit talking to them. How about if you were speking to african-americans and they were talking in ebonics, would you consider this i-moral? Maybe these people you are referring to do not want to talk to you, so they are talking in a different dialect, in that case, just get a clue and talk to someone that has interest talking to you.
Quit being paranoid!

Do me a favor, say you are back in the Philippines, if a non-filipino speaks to you in their language(say english) demand them to speak in tagalog since you find it unethical for people to speak the non-vernacular language of a particular place.

wala ata akong kakampi dito ha! LOL!!! Ok lang!!!

[olivertravel]

I agree with NoBody... Chinese residents and especially Japanese tourists retain their own language. I have also seen French students and Israeli & German backpackers speak their own and keep to themselves.

As a pinoy raised and living in USA, all my relatives speak Tagalog around me... even though English is my first language & I need Tagalog lessons to understand my parents talking among themselves. I consider myself American and I believe that many Americans don't bother to learn the native tongues and customs of the places they go.

Hell yeah, go ahead and speak the language most comfortable.

[batang pasig]

This message goes out to my Sis, sampaguita,

you are not rude if you dont speak English in front of none flip people. I always do that, you know. So who cares if they dont understand you? I dont really give a hoot if they dont, who cares? if you want to include them in your conversation,, then speak English, its not rude as you would say, ang bastos ay ang mga kung sino man dyan na inis sa iyo dahil hindi lang naman inglis ang dialecto sa buong mundo. Kapatid, let those white trailer trash go back to their trailers, if you dig what im saying.

[Holier than thou]

I don't see anything wrong about that!!! I'm no sure about this but it is your right to speak in your own language with your kababayan.

[olivertravel]

Since my Tagalog is limited, I have already said that it does not bother me when my fellow Pinoys converse in Tagalog or whatever dialect around me... my elders do that all the time.

The closest I have been to being around a BIG Filipino community is with the Pinoys of Auckland, New Zealand... some of the girls would always whisper into other people's ears in your presence- now that was rude. If you are reading this, you know who you are...

[womanontop]

In my opinion, I don't think there's right or wrong answer here. It depends on the person's sensitivity level though it really depends on the situation. If let say, 2 people and myself are having a conversation,then suddenly they start talking in their language and totally ignoring me, then I think it's downright rude. Another scenario, my bestfriend is Polish and when I go to her house, her mom starts talking to her in Polish and sometimes to me too, then it doesn't bother me. Once in awhile, I'd butt in and says, listen to Mama, she knows better. I have another friend who is Chinese and when I'm invited to a party in her house, everybody speaks Chinese (specially the older guests) withought apologizing. This doesn't bother me either. I'm more interested in the food on the table than the topic of conversation. At work naman, it's more professional and a common courtesy to others to speak in English.

[batang pasig]

i THINK NOT! DI IBIG SABHIN ang mga hapon ang pinakabastos na tao sa buong mundo dahil sila ay nationalistic? but that dose not make you un-patrioticif you speak english, but in many cases, people who are not used to other cultures are not really used to having other people around them, let alone accepting their differences, if you are out from the boonies and all you eat is weiners and beans, then yeah you feel left out! how would he feel when he sees a taco or dinuguan? he will ask ask himself if people eat that kind of stuff,or somebody is playing a stupid joke on him.
I think its just a matter of accepting what you cant...,
really.

[sampaguita]

such animosity...

i don't think you quite got my drift. i still believe it's impolite to do that. and that's why i speak english around those who can't understand tagalog. is there anything wrong with that?

so sis, wag ka naman magalit. my reply wasn't meant to offend. peace na lang tayo. :)

[f0r5aK3n]

huh??? why a specific thread for sampaguita??? I believe we are alreaady discussing the "language" situation in the other thread.

[f0r5aK3n]

okay, this could be redundant.

Let's say a group of you are talking about a particular topic and there's a couple of Filipinos and the rest are English-only speaking people. The Filipinos now start speaking in Tagalog with each other regarding the topic of conversation with the others still included. I view this as rude because you are EXCLUDING them from the same topic of conversation.

[n0b0dy]

hey foreskin,

so be it! whatever it is being spoken in tagalog is not meant for them to hear or is not relevant to them. It aint rude! Besides, people can speak in all english and still EXCLUDE you from the conversation, and thats fine! Like I said before maybe you should get a new personality so people would care to talk to you!

hehehe JK bro.....

[f0r5aK3n]

hahahha.. yah.. mebbe i need to be more outgoing...

personally though, I don't really care.... I just feel for those people that do.. I can see their points of view regarding the mattah..

[guapakat]

I feel that it IS rude to speak in Tagalog in front of non-Filipinos. All of my mom's staff at her office are filipino. When I hang out there, they speak in Tagalog and it looks like the non Filipinos are annoyed and insulted because it seems like the pinoys are talking about them. The non Filipinos could take it in different ways. One could be that the pinoys are making fun of other co-workers.

[f0r5aK3n]

yah.. from THEIR point of view it is kinda un-courteous

[sampaguita]

*shrugs*

beats me bro.

hi. :)

[dreamer2]

definitely "yes"...

[n0b0dy]

no its not rude at all!

[- Caligirl -]

I haven't read all the comments (cuz I'm too lazy :p) but personally, I think it's pretty rude to talk tagalog in front of foreigners, especially in an office situation...It's just plain unprofessional.

[n0b0dy]

caligirl,

Well, if your are discussing something regarding your job I would not think it would not be appropriate to talk in tagalog. But, if it has something personal in nature and you do it during break time I think it is totally fine, and it isn't rude.

[- Caligirl -]

Well, I still think it's rude to talk Tagalog in front of foreigners and that's my personal opinion. Thank you very much.

By the way, I noticed that you've been sort of attacking people on this thread regarding their opinion. I'll admit -- I've been guilty of doing that in the past but eversince, I have learned my lesson here on PEx. Everyone has their personal opinion on things and I've realized that there's no point trying to change a person's take on a subject. They will always think what they want to think and in the end, you would have wasted your time trying so hard to make them agree with you.

[n0b0dy]

caligirl,

thanks for the lecture, ;) but, I am not trying to convince anybody to change their opinions. I used a very brash tone in my posts, and forsaken knows that I was just joking. also, I have apologized to people when I go overboard. ;)

I may be opinionated, but I know better not to act as if I am holier than thou....unlike some people! ;P

[- Caligirl -]

OH-WELL! :lol: By the way, don't give me that "holier than thou" BS cuz look who's talking! ;):lol:

[n0b0dy]

caligirl,

hehehe...


I am a jerk and I admit it! hehehe
Oh, I was not even reffering to you when I said some people are acting with that holier than thou attitude.... why so defensive?????

[n0b0dy]

I am holier than thou! you best recognize!

[- Caligirl -]

Originally posted by n0b0dy
I am not trying to convince anybody to change their opinions.By replying to my post, you know you were somewhat trying to convince me to share your opinion. If you just wanted to state your opinion, you could have posted just ONCE. Instead, however, you kept saying your piece OVER AND OVER, trying to challenge people's beliefs, and even resorted to mocking f0r5aK3n's name. In fact, you even started attacking the Fil-Ams who for the most part, agree that it is rude to talk Tagalog in front of foreigners.
Originally posted by n0b0dy
I feel all of you are wrong!... Maybe your problem is that you are afraid to be associated with or labeled as a "FOB" if you are seen with fellow Filipinos speaking tagalog in a mixed crowd of races.
Nanghihinayang siguro kayo dahil sayang ang lahat ng pag-prapractice ninyo ng American accent. LOL

So, to you my friend, WHAT-EVER! Go ahead and say what you wanna say cuz I don't give a flying hoot! ;):D

Alrighty y'allz...bye bye. :)

[- Caligirl -]

Originally posted by n0b0dy
caligirl,
I am a jerk and I admit it! hehehe
Oh, I was not even reffering to you when I said some people are acting with that holier than thou attitude.... why so defensive?????
It's good that you know what you are! ;)
Umm hello you know you were trying to make "parinig" PUH-LEASE. Once again, don't give me that BS! :lol:

Originally posted by n0b0dy
I am holier than thou! you best recognize!
Sure thing, Bubba...Whatever you say.... ;):lol:


[Edited by - Caligirl - on 03-27-2001 at 03:34 AM]

[*LaRKSpuR*]

For me I think it's not that bad to speak Tagalog when some people cannot understand it as long as you're not making others feel out of place. I mean if you talk Tagalog for too long, it's the same thing as isolating others from the conversation. I feel the same way when my aunt speaks Chinese and I don't understand her. I sometimes think that she might be saying something interesting and only I don't understand it. :|

[Cali4Nia]

Originally posted by womanontop
In my opinion, I don't think there's right or wrong answer here. It depends on the person's sensitivity level though it really depends on the situation. If let say, 2 people and myself are having a conversation,then suddenly they start talking in their language and totally ignoring me, then I think it's downright rude. Another scenario, my bestfriend is Polish and when I go to her house, her mom starts talking to her in Polish and sometimes to me too, then it doesn't bother me. Once in awhile, I'd butt in and says, listen to Mama, she knows better. I have another friend who is Chinese and when I'm invited to a party in her house, everybody speaks Chinese (specially the older guests) withought apologizing. This doesn't bother me either. I'm more interested in the food on the table than the topic of conversation. At work naman, it's more professional and a common courtesy to others to speak in English.

I sorta agree with WomanOnTop's comment...yeah depends on the situation...just as long as people don't feel out of place.

When my non pinoy friends are over and I talk to my mom in tagalog in front of them I usually translate and tell 'em what's going on and what's being said.

But definitely in professional working situations it's a BIG no no.

So I've softened my stance...hehehehe.